Pirate's Log Book

Double, Double, Toil n' Trouble

It's been forever since I've had the chance to update me log. Sailin' has been rough, what with all them hurricanes n' the new school year, n' the publishin' o' me logs and all that. I've been up to no good, like a good Pirate should.

I have been perfectin' me jedi skills. I can now land on the mess hall counter with me four feet planted securely. I can also scale the cupboard doors n' hoist meself up. That be a good skill for me boardin' o' enemy ships! I can haul me weight up n' attack! ... or counter surf, whichever be more appropriate.

Captain found me weak spot a lil' while back. I be very difficult to bribe - the Toller o' Nine Tails and the First Mate both be a-losin' their good sense o'er a morsel o' food. I ne'er lose me head that way. Food be for the birds n' the bird dogs. But, like everyone, I have me Achilles' Hock... n' it's me brand spankin' new Firehose Tug. Those crazy Shoot-hoondzes people sure do know how to make tugs. I will do anythin' for me play time with that thing. n' I be retrievin' to hand like a pro, too. The Captain says I could even show the Toller o' Nine Tails a thing or three!

I also be discoverin' swimmin', like a good little Pirate. Here be some pictures o' the lake (there's a Zap somewhere in that big splash) n' o' me, swimmin'! I be so handsome when I be swimmin', except that I be thin as a rail n' the Captain says I look like a llama on stilts. Pfffft. I just be svelte n' still ruggedly handsome!

I be stealin' things once in a while - me latest success be a-stealin' thread from the top o' the Captain's sewing machine (while she was usin' it, no less!) Jumped up on a chair, leaned o'er caaaarefully... and yoink! I win! She be assemblin' costumes for two plays with them there young sailors. Beh. I don't much care for the young sailors. Too unpredictable, the lot o' 'em.

I be participatin' in the effort, as you can see in me picture. Always helpin', that's me!

Otherwise, things be quiet on board. I discovered how to blow bubbles in me bucket o' water in the brig. I didn't do it because there be somethin' at the bottom of me bucket... I just enjoy stickin' me nose in there n' blowin' air n' then snappin' at the bubbles but I can't seem to keep them bubbles *there* so I can catch 'em. I keep a-tryin', though. Someday, I will master this skill.

I also be busy usin' me new trick for gettin' me fair share o' snuggles. I climb o'er the back o' the captain's chair (from a dinin' room table chair!) n' land in her lap. It's very stealthy n' ninja like o' me. Lately, I be snugglin' the Captain like a toddler, she says. I sit in her lap with me paws around her neck, n' snuggle up against her neck. Soooometimes she bounces me on her knee singin' "Little Pirate FooFoo" n' I grin n' lick her face. I have a great Aussie grin, she be a-sayin'. I be a charmer, what more can I say!

We be headin' out on an away mission today - fabric, IKEA, the hardware store where everyone knows me name... n' some lunch, too. Oooooo... I wonder if we'll be a-goin' where there be them windows the food comes out of. When we be a-goin' there, sometimes I be lucky n' get me a hamburger. Far better than hardtack, let me tell ye...

Pass the Grog, it's gonna be a long day, methinks.