Pirate's Log Book

I be goin' to be a smart one!

On Monday next, I am going to become a very learnèd pirate. The Captain and the Navigator are taking me to the ship surgeon to get tutored. Imagine that! Me, smarter than I already be! Tutored! When I said this to the Toller of Nine Tails, his eyes went wide... but he wagged his tail a little. I be not sure what the meanin' of that be, but everyone seems to think this will be a good thing for me piratiness n' me anxious sea-dog tendencies.

The Rug kind of lifted his head from his sleepin' spot and said somethin' about him rememberin' his tutorship at the University. Not only that, but his tutorship was in front of lots of young ship surgeons in trainin'. How wonderful that be, I ask ye! I be glad I just get to hang out with Dr. Harris n' become all learnèd. I'll be so smart! I'm getting a dogtorate degree!

I've gotten me a new assignment this past week. While me Captain was plannin' to make me work like the Provost and the First Mate, things have changed a bit on board the ship. The Captain is going to need a right-hand-dog soon, and that might as well be me! She and I get along real well, n' I know just how to help her out. Besides, I be more interested in me beloved Captain than anyone else. I be likin' this new career path. Besides, them little pirates, they're shifty and unpredictable, and I be told they aren't like sheep n' that I can't herd them the same way.

I think I be ready for me new job. I get to be all certimificated by a school for wayward helpin' pirates when I be a little older. They have accepted me and me captain as partners in their school! With that *and* gettin' tutored, I'm going to be the smartest pirate in the class! I just wish it didn't come with the price tag that me Captain is sore, and hurtin', and going to see that crazy guy named Rheuma Tologist on Wednesday. Me Captain n' I found out she has AS last week, but she still be fierce n' besides, she still controls the access to the hard tack and the grog... and the shore leave.

I've been a-helpin' with the makin' of new pirate suits for me Captain and auntie Em's play lately. Most of me work has involved keepin' the fabric from runnin' away. I be very effective at this sort o' thing. I be such a multitaskin' Pirate!

Nothin' much else to report on these shores. I done been gettin' meself into trouble a little, and in ways that the Captain wasn't too happy 'bout. That's part of why she's havin' me educated (tutored! Me! I can't wait!) She also said it would be great for me workin' career to be smart like that, so if it'll help me climb the ladder at work, I be likin' that proposition. No pirate wants to remain a cabin boy forever! I may have to stop chewin' paper if I want to go up in the world, though. Meh. Maybe later. There be no huge rush, right?